My day today was as mundane as ever. Little bit of reading, some surfing of the interweb, and of course, gorging myself on the latest fad diet: The see-food diet. Whilst rummaging through the kitchen cabinets, I stumbled upon a can of sprinkles. Enticed by the bright colors and happy childhood experiences associated with these lustrous little pebbles, I was ready to pour them down my pharynx. But problems soon arose...
Through my recent endeavors in nutrition I have picked up some new habits. One of which has become an almost involuntary reflex: checking the nutrition label of whatever I eat. It was this urge being satisfied as my cupped hands slowly rotated that cylindrical container of sprinkles; allowing my eyes a clear view of what seemed a rather unremarkable shade when compared to the lustrous rainbow coloring the other side of the label.
I'll sum up the rest of my adventure in a more terse manner, nothing henceforth is worth mentioning in much detail. The contents revealed sugar as the first ingredient and some partially hydrogenated oil as the second. Not even during my most ravenous would I dare ingest such deadly poisons. Setting down the container was my next obvious move, though a seedling had been planted, unknowingly,within my meager little mind.
Following the usual vagaries of afternoon life, I was yet again faced with hunger. My eyes had yet again glanced upon a those pellets of death--sprinkles. This time walking away seemed unnatural, as if my brain was suddenly urging me to action. It was what happened next that brought great tumult into an otherwise tranquil patch of backwoods: I threw away the sprinkles.
My sister's adrenals almost instantly began to secret stress hormones as she raced to the trash, shallowly hoping that my words were just another harmless outcry from the local bum standing tall on a soapbox that was more dead than alive. As she caught sight of beautiful colors intermingled with the decaying matter in our kitchen receptacle, she made a violent roar. Her jumbled, though passionate screech alerted my mother to the events which had taken place.
Her indoctrination began instantly. It was her money, who cares what was in them, I HAD NO RIGHT!!! Even now i'm uncertain whether I should reappear in the most public and occupied domain of our house, that's right, the room bearing our beloved television. But that's a topic for another post. I leave you with a quote from the mother bear herself, when told about my plan to make the events that had just transpired into public record, she responded, "If you don't appreciate what you have, then go ahead!"
Let the discussion begin. All comments are welcome!
